The link below will take you to the results of my 12 days of Christmas photo meme. I took the challenge from Ladybug Heather, although I think sh meant we were supposed to take all 12 pictures and post them at once. Since I like anticipation more than the event itself (typically), I decided to spread it out on the 12 days leading up to Christmas.

The order changes, due to each post being promoted to the top of my stream each time it is liked or commented on, but they are all there.

I got lazy on most of them. And I didn’t even try to make any of them Christmasy…just making sure they made the right number. Not sure if I will be able to compete with the folks doing the 100 day photo challenge next year. :p

Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS to all my Christian friends, and Happy Holidays to everyone!

Josh

Meme Link: http://friendfeed.com/search?q=Twelve+Days+of+Christmas+meme&who=joshhaley

What did you do yesterday? Yeah? Cool. Oh, me? Nothing. Except I maybe launched a podcast with 2 friends from opposite corners of the earth: John Worthington of Brisbane, Australia and Mark Wilson of London, Ontario, Canada. Yeah.

I have neglected this blog sorely, yes. But now I’m here, so zip it!

I have been over at FriendFeed for the past 6 months or so. It’s more fun. It’s way easier to post stuff and you get to actually have people read what you write for a change, and they write you back. It’s amazing stuff.

So we created a podcast to get into the various aspects of FriendFeed and what makes it tick and why we love it and how to get the most out of it. I hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoyed putting it together.

Josh

Precisely 6 months ago, and also on a Saturday, you came screaming into this world, strong yet so fragile. I held my breath as you took your first. I loved you instantly.

Your smile and captivating eyes have brought me and the whole family an extraordinary amount of joy. You greet me every day with a look of recognition and cheer, and I am a Daddy anew. Your tiny presence fuels our home with energy and happiness.

Your sister and brothers also love you, almost too much, if there were such a thing. They actually get into fights over who gets to hold you and play with you next. Yes, I love them as well, and they were once as tiny as you.

I couldn’t wait for 12 months to write this letter to you, my youngest child and lovely daughter. You inspire me to rise to the privilege of being your father.

You are equally one of the 5 most beautiful things I have ever seen on this wonderful planet.

I pray that I will be able to be there for you and guide you into becoming the wonderful girl and woman you want and ought to be.

I love you,

Daddy

I started a fire today. It was neccessary. The stupid thing was asking for it. For days now, this thing has brought nothing but sorrow and pestilence to our household. It made the strongest of my children shriek with terror when she felt the chilling effects of this unwanted beast.

My patient wife spent the days biding her time, waiting for me to burn the monster that was terrorizing our family. Today was finally the day.

I armed myself and made it cautiously into the attic. I could feel its presence. I flipped on the light. I slowly turned my head and it was right there in my face breathing a foul stench right on my face. I remained calm, as I knew it couldn’t do anything to me unless directly provoked.

I leaned closer toward it, the smell growing stronger. I readied my torch and slowly made my way around the menace. While in its blind spot, I leaned in and thrust my torch into it’s belly. Nothing. I missed the sweet spot. I regrouped, wiped the sweat from my forehead, took a deep breath of sweltering air, held it and this time slowly advanced my weapon. FWOOOSH! Gotcha. The beast knew I was there now, and I had only seconds to get out before I was burned along with it.

I clumsily sealed the opening I had made, put out my torch, rose to my feet, and…silence. There was one more thing to be done, to assure the beasts demise. I needed to increase the size of the small flame I had just started. I reached down to the foot of the monster and turned the dial. KA-FWOOOOM! This noise and the new light shining in the attic was proof enough that my job was done.

There were shouts of joy and praise in the house upon my return. Never before had they seen such an act of heroism or bravery.

I re-lit the water heater.

My wife just grounded me. Seriously. My office has become SUCH a mess that it has come to this unprecedented need for discipline. “You can’t buy anything, like, ever again until you clean up this office.” she said. To tell you the truth, I’m relieved. It means she might be OK with me buying something ever again! Alrighty then! No problemo! All-a-sudden cleaning my room became fun.

But first, I need to find some cool stop-motion or time lapse software to take periodic photos of the whole operation and make a cool time-lapse video of the room getting clean. Yeah, so now I’m still sitting here, looking for that, while the room is still a mess. See what I’m up against? I am easily distracted. Wish me luck.

Dear Lottery Winners,

I invite you to firmly point your fingers right at me and laugh out loud that you pulled off the near-impossible and won a sum of money, large or small, by playing the lottery. Go ahead. Enjoy it while you can.

Now for the other 99.99% of you, aka “Losers”, I ask only this:

STEP ASIDE AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR  MONEY-WASTING LOTTERY BUSINESS ON YOUR OWN TIME AT THE CONVENIENCE STORE/GAS STATION SO THE PEOPLE WAITING IN LINE BEHIND YOU CAN PAY FOR THEIR SODA AND LEAVE.

Just because you have the right to waste your time and money, doesn’t give you the right to waste MY time, which IS money. Think I’m a sore loser? You’re right…a sore loser when I’m losing MY time because of YOU.

That is all. Thank you.

Josh

One day, I was at Lowe’s picking up some household odds and ends with my family, when we walked by the grill section. I always looked but never touched when it came to these stainless steel outdoor monster kitchens, but this one had a yellow sign on it showing the normal price and then the clearance price. Let’s just say that the clearance price was well below 50% of the original price. Already assembled, it was a no-brainer. I got help putting it in the truck and help getting it out of of the truck and into my garage for the night. That night lasted about 4 months.

You see, this grill was supposed to replace our old, dying propane grill. Propane. That was the plan. While going over the manual for my newly acquired stainless “steal”, I found that it is a natural gas grill, not meant for propane. Did I mention that I didn’t have a gas line hookup at the back of the house? Did I mention that the grill weighs a ton and takes up a quarter of the garage? But did I mention it was a GREAT deal?

So I spent the next month or so figuring out a way to get a gas line to the backyard. Every cell in my body was telling me not to mess with something that could blow my entire house and family up. But normal people do this stuff all the time, why shouldn’t I be able to? I had to overcome my fear of messing with gas lines.

After extensive research, I was about to go the route of using galvanized steel piping and fittings, to tap into the gas at the meter and swing it around the house to the back yard, all buried and professional. That seemed like a lot of money and extra time just to get a grill running, so I put it off and even decided against it later.

I tried to find a natural gas to propane conversion kit for my grill. They exist, but require a bunch of swapping out of parts and drilling orifices larger and…yes, I said orifices…and even when I had an experienced person do the math and figure out if it was do-able on my particular grill, the answer was basically no. I would have to give up the two infrared grill elements, and that’s just silly. So, back to the natural gas dilemma.

I was starting to get a bit desperate. I had called around to a few grill stores to ask them about the propane conversion kits and none of them had ‘em, but one guy, who seemed a bit eccentric, did offer up and alternative that ended up being what I decided to do. He mentioned that there is plastic tubing called Pex tubing that can be run using special compression fittings, right from the meter to wherever you need it. So below is the photo-essay that shows how it all came together. Having had countless conflicting opinions offered to me to solve this problem, I ended up having to piece together the bits of information I collected and make it happen myself. All this to save myself from exorbitant plumbing prices.

I started to buy the parts I would need: 60+ feet of 7/8″ OD (Outer Diameter) yellow Pex tubing. Apparently this stuff had to be ordered special by my local grill store. Look it up if you need some. I also learned from the “dude” at the grill store about various compression fittings and ways to tap the gas meter, none of which I properly documented on film to show here. I’ll see if I can post and update on it later. So, it looked like the ball was rolling now that I had my supplies. I was missing energy and motivation to begin actually digging. Then I remembered the most important step in installing a new gas line:

Do NOT skip this step: Get a friend to help you dig the trench!

My friendly neighbor John took time out of his busy schedule on a hot day to help dig (and when I say help, I mean he did most of the work. He’s just faster at it than I am!). We decided to dig the trench the width of the shovel, making it easier to get the shovel into the trench. The depth we dug to was approx 12″. It helped to keep the clumps of dirt and grass nearby to make it easier to plop back into the ground afterwards.

My daughter Sarah, who likes to do yardwork in white clothing, was eager to help with the digging.

She used a spade to take care of the details of the trench, making sure the depth was maintained throughout. This is important, so the tubing doesn’t get crimped up in a roller coaster ride unnecessarily.

While digging at a great pace, we managed to find the internet/cable that runs to the house, but not until we thrust the sharp shovel right through it! Yes, we cut ourselves off from the rest of the world when we cut our cable line. (click for larger image)

Not to fear. I know how to create RF plug ends and had a couple of couplers lying around, so with supplies at hand, I was able to get the cable reconnected and taped up with electrical tape.

The final result is shown here.

Not too bad eh? The main thing is that the connection works! And it does, or this blog post wouldn’t make it very far.

The digging on the side of the house to the gas meter was then completed. Here’s a view looking from the fence to the meter with the tubing laid in it:

And from the opposite angle:

You can see that we gave ourselves plenty of leeway on the length of the tubing, just to be safe. It’s a few more bucks, but worth it. Also, note that the ends should be covered to keep dirt out until it’s time to make the connections. I used tape.

The parts that would have been really cool to document, I neglected to. I learned from John how to sweat joints on copper tubing with a propane blowtorch. If you told me a few months ago that I would be using a blowtorch to weld tubing that would feed gas to a grill on my property and NOT feel like my house is going to explode, I would have laughed in your face. But look, I did it. I needed help, and got it when I needed it, and that made it happen.

So the line installed and leak tested, I had the challenge before me to get the grill TO the backyard. This thing is heavy and has wheels. I have grass going all the way to the backyard, no pavement, and heavy things with small caster wheels do not roll in Texas grass. So I got some plywood and a helper. This is when it’s great to have kids to help you out, I tell ya. Here’s Seth giving me a hand with negotiating a turn in the backyard with the new grill. (These photos were taken by the other helper and son, Zack)

We basically used the same three pieces of plywood over and over to roll the grill to the back, over the grass. I guess that’s what a professional installer would be facing too, right? Or maybe they would have assembled it in the backyard in the first place? Well, I bought mine assembled, remember, so I was stuck.

So we plugged her in and turned her on and it has been working beautifully ever since. We turn the gas off at the meter tap when the grill is not in use for more than a day or so. Not sure if that’s necessary, but for now, I sleep a little better with it being like that. So here’s what it looks like plugged in.

I am now committed to doing a better job at maintaining my backyard so we can feel more comfortable grilling out there, heck maybe have guests over too!

And here it is with its grill cover on. There’s a lot of pollen in the air lately and I would not want to try to clean that off of this nice new grill. Nope.

I would like to build some sort of covering for this part of the backyard. It’s not very big. The cement slab is roughly 12′ x 14′ or so. Just enough to keep the direct sun and rain off of the backdoor and grill would be nice. But the damn HOA will have to stay away!

Update: It’s now May and I am finally getting around to finishing this blog entry. This pic is from yesterday, a good day, in my opinion. And just look at those veggies and pork steaks! Yum!

I started the day getting help from John, yet again, on replacing the actuators in my truck’s doors. They are the thingies that actually move the lock up and down when you flip the switch on the door armrest itself or the keychain remote entry. I didn’t have the patience or clean hands to document this procedure, but luckily this guy did. His photo essay made it possible for me to visualize what needed to be done. Then when I ran into problems, John was there to rescue me.

What a guy. Everyone needs a John in their neighborhood, for sure. The gas project saved us about $775. The door lock actuator replacements that we did on our own (I paid for parts only, at a cheap online place), saved us about $477. He said he’s going to help me replace the truck’s ball joints soon too, a saving s of about $1100!! Seriously, folks….it PAYS to learn how to do stuff out there! I plan on either taking an auto class or hanging out more with mechanics or John because, look at those numbers! That really does add up.

Thanks again, John!

I’m in love again! Zoe came into the world on January 12, 2008 at 12:57 pm in Houston, Texas. She weiged in at 8 pounds, 12 ounces and measured 20.75 inches long. I was right there when she took her first breath and I am still amazed at emotion and feelings that sweep over me, this being our fourth child.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Yes, I know I stink, but I know I used to be good, so I am using this to help me see if I can improve later on this year.

I am trying to return to my roots, which is drumming. I started in 7th grade on snare drum and have played all kinds of drums since then off and on. Freshman year in high school was when I fell in love with the electric bass, so I spent a lot more time doing that than drumming. I played percussion in band and stand-up bass in orchestra at the University of Hawaii (who is playing right now in the Sugar Bowl! Go Warriors!).

So in an effort to lay down musical ideas as they come and to hopefully become inspired anew, I got this electronic drum set (a Roland V-Drums TD-3KW) and am enjoying it very much. 2007 has truly been very good to us!

Here’s a few more examples of the drum kit sounds available, along with my rough chops.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Those who say “irregardless” should be sent to the grammatical equivalent of Guantanamo Bay until they get it all out of their system and unlearn all of the bad habits they picked up throughout the years.

“Ir-” is a negative prefix. If you are irreverent, you are the opposite of reverent. If you are irregular, you are the opposite of regular, or your pooper’s stuck.

The suffix “-less” is also a negative, depending on how it is used. If you are brainless, you do NOT have a brain. If you are penniless, you don’t have any money. If you are futless, you have no idea what’s going on (Hawaii humor, I’m helpless to resist).

You can irritate or irrigate or even feel irregular, but you can’t say “irregardless”.

I will also take this time to repost my Ode to Diet Coke, for those who have not yet read it.

Grant us the strength
to make it through each day
with the help of Diet Coke

Grant us the temperature of product
that is as cold as possible
without little slushies

Grant us ample access
to fountain, bottle and can
in that order

and ice
oh yes, grant us ice

Grant the linings of our throats
the tenacity and power
to guzzle your cold, fresh nectar
in one held breath

Grant us pretty stars and spinning rooms
when we catch our breath
from such gulps

May we always have enough change
for a diet coke for ourselves and a friend

May we always have the means
to keep our diet coke cold

May it last
longer in styrofoam

May it maintain
full carbonation

May it remain
cold cold cold

May it provide
minutes of refreshment

May it quicken
both mind and body

May it never
get mixed with the root beer feed line by careless workers at some random buffet

May it ever
be sugar and guilt free

May it always
be near me

Oh diet coke
we do love thee

–by Josh Haley, Houston, TX

This topic really sets me off. There may be readers here that I know personally, that choose not to spank their kids and they are about to find out what I think about it and their kids, but I feel so strongly about it, that I have to overlook that. Let’s take a look at the Bible on the topic:

Prov. 29: 15.
15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.

Prov. 13: 24
24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

2 Sam. 7: 14
14 I will be his father, and he shall be my son. If he commit iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men.

Children need to know they are loved. In no way is spanking meant to show anything but love for a child. It is not in the vein of punishment for spite that I am in support of, it is punishment in the vein of teaching. If a child of yours was to disobey a rule that you have established for their own protection, i.e., “No heelie-skating in the street or in parking lots”, they might be killed or seriously harmed. Such was almost the case about a week ago when a car slammed on its brakes to a stop right in front of my bewildered daughter, who had just broken the rule mentioned here.

If I don’t show her how serious that disobedience was, and what could have happened, then I am not being a good enough parent, and perhaps should be on trial for that.

What punishments do you remember from your own childhood? For me, it is by far the ones that hurt my rear end the most. Sure, there were other punishments such as restrictions, and they were not fun at all, but I honestly do not remember any of those instances as vividly as the spanking of a loving parent with the Jokari paddle. Yes, I even remember the name of the paddle, so effective was this punishment. It is a very dense, layered, heavy, thick, menacing, albeit ergonomic, paddle from a tethered ball game named Jokari. (see pictures)

I rarely made the same mistake (I mean the big ones, here…we’re not perfect, any of us) twice, thanks to this paddle.

Did I hate my parents for it? Not one bit. Did I think for a minute that they hated me for my mistakes? It never crossed my mind for a second. Did I actually enjoy getting spanked? Heck no! I remember that, if I had time, I would run and put on extra pairs of underwear to dampen the blow, but it always hurt, more in my chest than on my rear, because I knew I let my parents down.

But I tell you right here and now, it takes a “drastic” measure such as this to get the point across to adolescents. Spanking wouldn’t work on adults, yet this law they are debating would not allow parents to spank their kids until they are 18 years old. Is it just me or does that seem completely bizarre and backwards? Who spanks an 18 year old son or daughter?

Let’s also take a look at sports groups and the military. They both employ training methods that require physical punishments for bad behavior or lack of performance. The terms “Drop and give me 20″, or “Give me 100 down-up-downs” don’t make worse athletes or soldiers, they make better ones. The punished involved in these scenarios will try much harder to not make the same mistake to avoid the same punishment again.

What about the parents who decide not to spank their children? All I want to know is this, and I want you to dig way down deep and answer this one truthfully: Are you happy with the majority of your child’s behavior? Do you consider your child to be consistently disrespectful and rude or are they consistently courteous and respectful? Don’t get me wrong, spanking a child does not make them instantly perfect, not by a long shot. I still have to remind our kids daily of things they tend to forget about. And when they break one of the major rules (mostly centered around dishonesty), that’s when everything needs to stop and they need to be spanked and talked to.

Yes, I mention that they also need to be talked to, or the spanking is almost for nothing. They must understand why they are being spanked. They also need to know that they are still loved, no matter what. Perhaps the person championing the anti-spanking act is someone who has experienced abuse of this very important role. There is such a thing as spanking too hard and too much, and perhaps they wish to facilitate the enforcing of this rule by not allowing it at all. I am willing to try to see their side on this if it made sense, but so far it is ludicrous and takes away from family unity.

And now the big target I paint on my own back: Those of you that I know that do not spank your children, simply because you think spanking is wrong? Your children are brats. They are rude to me and others and it always gets under my skin when I have to bite my tongue when they offend (I also feel strongly that people should not overstep the boundaries of parenthood by discipling other’s children). Especially in my own house and when it affects my children. Do you know how hard it is to get my child to stop mimicking your rude child? No, I will not hold it against you that you made this decision, but I am finally speaking out, saying something about it. My kids are not better than your kids and neither is the opposite true. That is not the issue. The issue is that your methods aren’t working and it is affecting my family.
I’m all for trying to stop abuse in the home, but we can’t let legislators take away the thing that made us who we are today: the personalized and effective physical punishment of a loving parent. I will not raise my children with my hands literally tied by the government. The government shall not interfere in my family’s personal affairs, whether it be in the home with this proposed law, nor with mandatory “tolerance” classes at school, for things our family is taught to abhor. But that is another blog.

Josh

Click here to view the embedded video.

This is the world premiere (I know, sounds so official) of KOLOB, a fanfare for orchestra by me, Joshua Haley. It is my first large-scale composition for orchestra, and definitely the first one that I was able to have performed. The University of Hawaii at Manoa Symphony Orchestra (of which I was a member for years on bass) was kind enough to rehearse and perform this piece.

It was performed as shown here at Kahala Mall center stage, in Honolulu, Hawaii on November 11, 1997. Theresa McCreary, the 1st chair cellist, served as guest conductor for Henry Miyamura.

I make no apology for using inspiration from John Williams and his wonderful works. He was the key inspiration for this fanfare, as well as completing my college composition assignment! :p

I must tell you, a LOT of work goes into getting to this point. It’s one thing to have the piece written, another to have all of the parts properly formatted and printed, and then be lucky enough to have an orchestra perform it for me.

I had a dat recorder and a video camera at this performance to get proper recordings, and guess what? Neither worked properly! I went through days of discouragement until I found out that a parent of one of the bass players recorded it on his camcorder and was willing to let me make a copy. Thus the focus on one of the bass players for a time in this video.

Enjoy! Feedback appreciated.

Josh

I am Buckethead. (Look it up…OK, fine, here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buckethead) The office insisted on me showing up today in a costume and I really didn’t feel like getting one, figuring out who to be, etc. Then I had an idea that just might work. If I could find a black long-haired wig (common) and a ski-mask (also common), AND if I could convince my local KFC to give me a bucket – hold the chicken, then I could be buckethead. i went to 3 different places to look for costumes, and the first KFC I went to obliged, no questions asked. Pretty funny how that worked.

Anyway, so here I am at work, one of only 3 people that decided to dress up. I guess that costume prize money might end up being mine after all, eh?

Happy Halloween! Oh, and rock on.

Update: About 10 people ended up dressing up, so that was good. I also was able to wrangle some security footage of when I first walked into work today and put it to some Buckethead music. Enjoy.

Click here to view the embedded video.

That’s it. I just wanted to say that.

Interesting how traffic wasn’t so bad today. Perhaps a lot of people got “sick” today? Sucks for me, as I actually am a bit sick, but have to work (Downtown) nonetheless.

Enjoy it while it lasts. Tomorrow it could be gray and dreary or hot an humid all over again.